Over the Hills and Far Away
by VampireMassacrexx
Summary: Ciel is struggling to come to terms with the fates bestowed upon the members of the Noah's Ark Circus; his remorse and guilt has been eating him up on the inside for a long time which is why whilst recalling the events that led up until this point, he makes a decision which shakes up the structure of the Phantomhive manor.


***Warning* Spoilers for the 'Book of Circus' anime even during the introduction so be careful when reading on.**

Hello! VampireMassacrexx here with a story that finally isn't about a video game. =D This is only a very short story about 'Black Butler' during the 'Book of Circus' Arc. I've only seen the anime of it so it is based on that however, I am currently working my way through the manga so hopefully I should get there eventually but when you're in a creative mood, you just have to act on it which is why I wrote this despite not being up to that part of the manga so sorry if events/ character interpretations aren't entirely accurate.

I was personally very traumatised by the last two/three episodes of the anime and I personally believe that apart from the Baron and the Doctor, none of the other 'Book of Circus' characters should've died or at the very least not all of them. Sure what they were doing was wrong but they truly felt that they didn't have a choice and even if you feel like they deserved their fates, they were still very interesting characters and it would've been cool to see them develop past that Arc rather than having them just be bumped off.

...I still think Joker should've lived at least (this may or may not have anything to do with Matthew Mercer's awesome Irish accent)...and Doll because she was precious. I'm glad Snake lived though. =D

This Story is inspired by the song **'The Big Sleep'** by **Bat For Lashes** which is why the lyrics are at the beginning of the story.

So without further ado...

 ***Spoilers Warning*** Definite spoilers about the anime version of 'Book of Circus'.

 **Disclaimer:** I own nothing to do with 'Black Butler', its locations, characters etc. All rights go to their respective owners. Nor do I own anything to do with 'The Big Sleep' or 'Tom the Piper's Son', all rights go to their respective owners as well.

 **Rated T.**

* * *

'...How can it be the last show?...

...How can it be?  
How can it be the last show?  
How can it be?...

...No more spotlights  
Coming down from heaven  
It's a goodbye  
It's curtains double time...

...Not even out of my dress  
And already my voice is fading  
Goodbye my dears  
And into the big sleep...'

\- 'The Big Sleep'- Bat for Lashes.

* * *

 **Over the Hills and Far Away:**

Ciel just stood there taking in the sight of the crumbled walls around him, the splintered wood of the bench and the rusted iron bars that once protected the most unwanted, the most abhorred children in society. Those with missing limbs, scars and undesirable traits that made them so unlikeable even their parents didn't want to be associated with them. In all honesty this place before its downfall was a sanctuary to those who found themselves within its walls but now it was like its now deceased owner and the previous residents that he and Sebastian met during their brief time with the Noah's Ark Circus; broken, dirty and tainted with the horrors that it had no doubt experienced.

The young boy felt his heart twinge when he recalled those particular pawns on his chess table, despite everything that happened he couldn't help but wish that there was something he could've done to help them, they were only doing what they thought they had to do for their twisted father's sake. _But...not_ just _for his sake, no._ Ciel recalled, for the sake of their 'brothers and sisters' whom they believed still occupied this residence but if they'd bothered to do their research they could've freed themselves from their fates and lived.

"But humans are stupid, always relying on blind faith to help guide their way no matter how misplaced it is proven to be." The Earl muttered under his breath. "I am no different and neither were they..."

...

... ...

... ... ...

In the space of one evening it seemed that he'd lost everything that he held dear. The people he'd classed as cherished friends and family had left him in charge of their travelling home as they'd gone to take care of some business. They often left him out of the loop whenever they disappeared into the night but they'd always been back long before first light so why was this time different?

He could only think of one reason: Black and Smile.

Ever since they'd arrived and also with the arrival of Suit, there had been many strange occurrences within the Circus. All of the main cast had seemed on edge especially Joker and Beast. He really wished that someone had bothered to tell him what was going on so he could've helped but instead he was left behind to make sure the show went on without a hitch and now they'd all left him, he'd failed to protect them, failed to be of use to the only people who had ever accepted him for who he was.

He lifted a hand up to his face and felt the scaly skin on his cheeks; this skin had always made him an outcast in the same way Joker and Beast's missing limbs and Peter and Wendy's stunted growth had. There was no other place for him other than here even if they were hiding something from him he didn't care! He loved them, he loved the Circus. He loved the way that an abnormality that had made him a victim of ridicule was seen as something beautiful and incredible by the people who came to see him perform.

It was for that very reason that he had decided to leave to leave it for the time being, just until he could reunite with the other First-String members and his first port of call would be to wherever Smile and/or Black were. _They must know something!_ He thought with no doubt in his mind and he would hunt them down even if it took him the rest of his days.

...

... ...

... ... ...

The trembling figure stood before him, their hand clutching onto their weapon for dear life as the light of the fire illuminated her in the darkness, she looked like a devil with rage contorting her face and her eyes so filled with malice and disbelief at the fact that her family was gone including her brother Joker- the one person she never thought she'd lose no matter what.

He knew all of this and yet despite that, he couldn't muster the energy to even warrant a glance in her direction- he was too tired and traumatised to care.

"She wants her family." He whispered to his butler as she started to charge towards the boy and his servant, raw agony plain in her voice. She had gone past the precipice of madness and whilst she was no doubt she was lied to by the Baron she referred to as her ' _Father'_ but that didn't excuse the murders of children (even if that was a crime that Ciel himself was now guilty of even if he was too devoid of emotion at that moment to admit it to himself), he couldn't let her go no matter how painful it was for him to order the execution of the person who had become his closest friend in the Circus.

She was someone who had offered him sweets, shared her breakfast with him and had protected him when he was caught looking through the tents of the First-String members. Whether she was Freckles or Doll, she was there for Ciel and he'd repaid her kindness by robbing her of all she knew and even if it _was_ justified he'd still somewhat hoped that she wouldn't make an appearance so he wouldn't _have_ to have her killed or he wished to prolong it at the very least.

Despite the fact he knew she was trying to kill him, he just kept looking into the distance as Sebastian went through the motions that had become so commonplace that night.

It was only when he felt that they were moving did he bother to move and he just shuffled a bit so he could glance over his butler's shoulder to see the remnants of the building which was slowly burning to ash and the shadows that were closing in around it marking the end of a cruel evening.

...

... ...

... ... ...

Ciel's grip tightened on his cane as his face twisted with emotion. Looking back on that evening he felt such remorse especially at what became of Doll and the children. It was strange for him to feel that way especially since it wasn't the first time he'd had people executed for their crimes and no matter how sorry he felt for them- they had committed crimes.

..."Only two kinds of people exist in this world, those who steal and those who are stolen from."...

That's what he'd said to Joker and he'd meant those words; he'd had everything taken from him, all he knew, all he cared for and yet he didn't go around murdering innocents.

 _...Apart from those children..._ His mind taunted him. But he was only doing them a favour! He knew what it was like to be broken beyond repair, being that way had made him enter into a contract with a demon just to escape from that horrific fate. He'd done the right thing...right?

"So in the end...I'm like you and yet I still played your judge, jury and- in a sense- your executioner so why am I still alive?" He asked of no one in particular. What right did he have to life when those children no longer had theirs? No matter how bad their lives would've been- having a life was better than not having a life at all right?

He could see it all so clearly;

Joker pleading to for him to spare the life of a monster.

Said monster begging for him to be the one to put an end to his miserable existence.

Those doll-eyed children not even flinching as they were made to sit in cages or to perform Circus acts that they weren't trained to do.

The cheerful Irish lilt of Joker's voice that Ciel had become so used to contrasting sharply with his grimace as he presented a show as gruesome as the one that the Baron referred to as 'entertainment'.

Amongst so many other things, Doll's anguish, the doctor's madness, the burning building; all of it had made an imprint on his mind and from what he'd heard from his servants, their experience with the Circus troupe was no better, they'd been trying to escape but they'd all been killed regardless. Never had Ciel felt such remorse for his actions and yet despite that...

...All he could do was laugh.

...

... ...

... ... ...

'...Tom, Tom, he was a piper's son, he learned to play when he was young. And all the tune that he could play was over the hills and far away; over the hills is a great way off. The wind shall blow my top-knot off. Tom with his pipe made such a noise, that he pleased both the girls and boys, and they all stopped to hear him play, 'Over the hills and far away'...'

The solemn voice rang out signalling the young girl towards it; it was a song she'd heard him sing a thousand time before but never with such a broken tone, he was staring into the distance, not meeting her gaze, his body twisted so that he could watch 'Smile' as he cackled cruelly whilst 'Black' watched on in surprise at his Master's rant about humans...

..."Superficial, cruel, revolting. Isn't it even more demonic than a demon! Right! And I'm the same. I'm also filled with the same ugly contents as them. This is what a human is! I'm a human being! Sebastian!"...

"He finally admits that he's no different than us and yet he still gets to breathe the air and smell the flowers; too little too late if ya ask me." He sneered.

She didn't respond instead she just looked around herself..."Where is everyone else?"

The man turned to face her then, a sad smile playing at his lips, they went on ahead they...they couldn't bear to hear anymore about how we did so many cruel things for naught. I stayed behind to show you the way."

She met his gaze then, "The...way to where?"

He bent down then, his previous smile becoming a gentle one as he reached out a hand towards her, "To over the hills and far away."

...

... ...

... ... ...

For many months afterwards, the young Phantomhive Earl felt such remorse and guilt especially over what happened to Doll; he couldn't help but wish that he'd done things differently; that he hadn't let his emotions get to him and cloud his judgement but it was too late now which was why...

"We're looking for the other members of your troupe as well; they seem to have disappeared off the face of the Earth since we discovered their crimes."

Snake's eyes shifted away from the boy as he took in the news. "I need to find them." He whispered, his voice cracking. It wasn't often he spoke for himself but in this instance he felt the need to.

Ciel stood up then and stretched out his hand, "Which is why you should come and work for me; we can search for them together."

Snake was confused, he was being offered another place to call home? He'd been without one ever since he'd left the Noah's Ark Circus to try to find his family and that had led him here and he'd learned all about their 'late night activities' and that truth broke him beyond repair; his dear family had been a part of something so cruel and inhumane...but he still loved them and he wanted to help them find a better way to live out their lives and so...

"Thank you, Smile." He responded gratefully as he took the young Master's hand in his own and agreed to work for the boy who had the blood of his family firmly on his hands...

...Even if Snake didn't know it...yet.

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Well...I hope you liked it. I improvised a lot of the last section since I have only a brief idea of how that scene plays out and the events leading up to it so sorry if it sucks. Until next time. xXx


End file.
